In an effort to promote Barry Bonds and his march towards some of baseball’s most cherished records, the marketing and promotion department of the San Francisco Giants broadcasted changes to their planned promotions and giveaways calendar. According to Mark Smith, head of the Giant’s marketing and promotions department, the Giants want to increase their focus on of one of the greatest hitters and athletes the game of baseball has ever seen. Mr. Smith added, “We aim to give Barry (Bonds) the proper respect and attention he deserves.” “We are going ‘inject’ some enthusiasm into celebrating Barry (Bonds) and his past achievements by ‘pumping up’ our concentration on Barry.”

Jim Mitchell, President of Baseball Operations for the Giants, was disappointed regarding the apparent lack of Barry Bonds related promotions planned for the 2006 season. “Barry Bonds is on the brink of baseball’s most treasured records and we only have one day where 500 people could win a Barry Bonds autographed baseball!” “It became ‘clear’ to me,” Mr. Mitchell exclaimed, “we need to add weight, or muscle up if you will, our promotions.” “Barry is the main attraction at the ballpark this year and every day the promotions will reflect this!” “There will be no ‘burrito Santiago’ day (500 ticket-holders get a burrito with former catcher Benito Santiago’s picture on it), cancel ‘Guess the current name of former Candlestick Park/PAC Bell Park and SBC Park’ night and for the love of god please discontinue ‘urinate on Moises Alou’s hands day!”

The revised marketing effort includes: