Another film garnering some pre-Oscar buzz as a potential Best Picture nominee is “The Constant Gardner”.  After seeing it, I have no idea why. 

Directed by Fernando Meirelles of “City of God” fame, Gardener is the story of British diplomat Justin Quayle (Ralph Fiennes of “The English Patient” as Elaine put it so eloquently, “why won’t you just die already” fame) as he attempts to unravel the mystery surrounding his activist wife Tessa’s (Rachel Weisz seen alongside Brendon Fraser in the stink bombs “The Mummy” and “The Mummy Returns”) murder in the African countryside.  As he digs deeper into his wife’s activities in disease ravaged Africa, a vast conspiracy involving pharmaceutical manufacturers and the British government begins to unfold, and the discovery of which leads to the deaths of the Quayle’s. 

Pink Floyd said “hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way”, and Fiennes portrays this to a tea.  His character, who is obsessed with tending to the landscaping around his South African home, is quiet, wimpy, and uninteresting.  Weisz’s portrayal of the ultra liberal bleeding heart is stereotypical at best.  When coupled with the stunning lack of chemistry between these two wooden British thespians, the passion that drives Justin to seek out the truth is hard to believe.  I love a good conspiracy, and I don’t want to ruin it for you because the concept in this film is pretty evil and scary as well as VERY plausible, the mere fact that there is a decent backdrop does not automatically entitle this film to the Oscar. 

Meirelles’s start in the middle, back to the beginning to the middle and then finish with too many fucking flashbacks style is distracting rather than adding to the storyline.  The film’s core concepts are easy for the viewer to pick up, so I guess they tried to make it needlessly complicated in order to keep the viewer guessing.  The only thing I was left guessing was why people liked this film so damn much. 

There is a difference between a good or entertaining film, which this is, and a film worthy of the title Best Picture of the Year.  Gardener was at best a mediocre spy thriller with a tacked on love story that was less than believable told in a herky-jerky style that is supposed to look “indie” and therefore Oscar worthy. Watch it for the conspiracy and think about the evils of some Western governments and their heartless exploitation of third world nations, but forget about it on Oscar night.